The 9-Month Rule: A Gentle Guide to Letting Go

Written By Ashley Licari

One of the questions I hear most often when working with clients is:

"How do I know what to keep and what to let go of?"

Enter: The 9-Month Rule.

It's a simple but powerful guideline that helps us sort through the overwhelming items and feelings without guilt or confusion:

If you haven't used it in the last 9 months and don't see yourself using it in the next 9 months, it may be time to let it go.

This rule isn't about perfection or rigid minimalism. It's about making space for what serves you now—and gently releasing what no longer does.

Why 9 Months?

Nine months captures both seasons and circumstances. It spans holidays, weather changes, family routines, and unexpected life shifts. It's enough time, to be honest: if something hasn't earned its keep across all of that time, it's taking up space.

It's Not About Waste — It's About Worth

Decluttering doesn't mean tossing everything into a trash bag. At Neat & Nurtured, we focus on thoughtful decisions and intentional use.

  • That rolling pin your grandmother used? Keep it—and use it. Let her memory live in the dish you roll out together.

  • Do you have multiple heirlooms that you can't use or display? Choose one that brings the most connection or functionality.

  • A tea cart you inherited that's collecting dust? Repurpose it into a mobile desk for your work-from-home days.

But don't keep things just for the sake of keeping them. When items sit unused, they lose their purpose and power. It's okay to lovingly let go.

Ask These Questions:

  • Have I used this in the last 9 months?

  • Can I realistically see myself using it in the next 9?

  • Can I give it a new function or home within my space?

  • Does it still serve a purpose for who I am today?

If the answer is no—you're ready to release it.

Releasing ≠ Forgetting

Letting go doesn't mean forgetting the person, memory, or season of life attached to something. It means honoring it, making space, and giving yourself permission to live more freely now.

Need support making these decisions in your own space? You don't have to do it alone.

I'm here to help you sort, reflect, and reset—judgment-free.

If you are ready to take the next step in your journey, click here to book a consultation!

Ashley Licari